Current Players


Max Taylor

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Director, Fall 2018

BIO: Max enjoys long walks in public parks with features of significant art historical value. His lifelong dream has been to attend graduate school in Texas.


Ross Gaines

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BIO: Every day is a staycation when you’re adding value left and right to whatever organization is lucky enough to employ you.


Mihir Shah

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BIO: Look at Mihir. He loves you deeply and profoundly. You have never found someone like this before and you never will find someone like this again.


Gardner Davis

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BIO: Found on the red line in Chicago, Gardner’s favorite cheese is Roquefort.


Lauren Talley

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BIO: A twenty is chump change to Lauren. She’s rolling with the big shots. When not hanging in yuppie bars on the Upper East Side, she’s at La Rez with her brethren.


Patrick Clinch

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BIO: Patrick is the most hardened criminal in this organization. He got his last name from what he does with his fists when he’s about to smoke a fool. Oh, wait, that’s clench.


Jameson Blount

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BIO: Try not to laugh at Jameson’s condition. He is very sensitive about it. It is hard for him to break into the world of comedy because he is chemically unable to laugh.


Bridget MacPherson

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BIO: Ahoy, mateys! Bridget be a fierce and formidable opponent in the quest to conquer the seven seas. She sometimes swabs the poop deck backwards just to flex on a landlubber.


George Gildehaus

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BIO: [Personality Pending]


Hope Cary

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BIO: Named after the hit sequel to a 1988 early-autumn blockbuster, Hope Cary is an aspiring arthropod physician. Every stair she climbs is one step closer to achieving the fitness achievement on smelter quest scrolls online.

Alumni Section


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